it will all work out
and it will be like i dream it to be
with life drifting on
with you at my
When I like someone I write bad poetry. I write bad poetry during physics class. Based off of Shakespearean sonnets. God I'm a nerd.
Sighing softly in the arms of the night
Watching fair Diana cross the ink'd sky
Gently guiding winking stars with her light,
She smiles toward you, wherever you may lie.
She can do what I can not, flying away
Through the dark, able to escape from here.
The night has begun to darken, bright day
Banished from thought. You are not close or near.
Diana whispers from her heaven'ly state
Calming my heart, reassuring my soul
That you are close, that I must only wait
Time is all it takes to make me whole.
Closing my eyes I can see you stand there
You take my hand as we dance to music rare.
I'm in a melancholy mood. Not sad or happy, just...numb.
My weekend at the con was amazing, and things ended on probably the highest note they could. I'll probably write some more about the full extent of my con experience, but I'm just not really in the mood.
Classes are getting harder, musics getting tougher, sleep is getting lessened, nerves are on their last thread, and my heart...well...I can't decide if it's singing with joy or cracking at the edges.
All I'm looking for is my Posthumus. My King of France. My Berowne. My Benedick.
And someone to catch all those references.
So two (three?) months later....
And nothing has changed. Really.
Still have the same life, same problems, same feelings....woo.
Sakura-Con is in a week. Still not sure about costumes, but I will wear at least one...perhaps 2...I think...
And thats really about it.
I've got a boring life :/
You know what should go die in a fire? Emotions
Especially those emotions of regret and longing. I have never regretted anything, yet I've been thinking these past few weeks, past few days, hours, minutes...there is something I regret. Something that I think I wasn't able to realize at the time, overlooked for years...and now, suddenly...bam, can't stop thinking about it.
I feel like a horrible person, since these thoughts will do nothing but get me in trouble with myself. I wish I could change it. I wish I could say what I want and then it would be done with, I wouldn't have to think of it anymore, but....explaining it to people...to a person...to anyone...I would sound crazy.
I'm reminded of Love Actually, where the main theme is telling the truth at Christmas time...I wish I could. I wish I could tell you what I 'm feeling, how conflicted I've become. How much I've grown and changed, how, maybe, I'm ready now. Maybe this time? Telling the truth takes courage though, telling the truth means putting something out on the table, knowing its never going to be returned the way it started. I don't have courage though, I can't open myself to something that I don't know the outcome to.
And I think...they would just say no.
Writing a term paper makes me so happy that I only have to give an hour recital and not a capstone paper.
I think I'm beginning to make shit up in this paper. Oops. Guess what I'm going to be doing tomorrow?
3 finals and 1 term paper. Son of a whore...
I love Christmas. It just makes me feel warm and sleepy.
And the smells...wonderful.
I've been playing entirely too much WoW these past few weeks. Level 68 now though, two levels from non-stop instancing/building everything up again. And probably creating a dranaii warrior. Good times. I'll get Litch King when I get back to school in J-term.
My day has been really really good.
Like. Really good.
Test was moved. Made my solo my bitch. Reed was greatly improved on.
All I need to get now is a date and it'll probably be the best fucking day ever. Haha.
P.s: Brandy is an amazing drink...after the initial 15 seconds of SEARING HOT PAIN down my throat. Good times.